Thursday, August 18, 2011

The Cold, Hard Truth

Ok, so many of you have told me you like it when I share personal stuff, especially when it’s my normal,  “keeping it real” life. If you don’t like that and just want projects, you probably don’t want to read this post.

 

This is me being real. I’m a basket case these days. In fact, most of the time I feel like a chicken running around with my head cut off.

I’m doing all I can to keep my head afloat and I still feel like I’m drowning. Overwhelmed? Frazzled? You betcha.

 

It’s not anything in particular. Life is just coming at me faster than I can keep up. My baby is a sweetheart and the most mellow, sleepy baby I’ve had. I have really good kids, but they keep me busy. I used to be able to count on naptime and bedtime to craft or blog. I’m still not on a consistent naptime or bedtime yet with my 6-week old, so finding computer or craft time is difficult if nonexistent.

 

If I do find a spare moment, I kind of just want to sit down and relax. Maybe read a book or snatch a quick nap. Or if I’m feeling more energetic, I want to make cookies with my three older kids (ages 5, 4, and 2), or head to the park, library, or a splash pad. It’s suddenly hit me how fast my kids are growing up, and I want to make as many memories as I can with them.

 

There are days when I think, “What’s the point of even doing my blog anymore?”. Besides the time factor, it’s hard not to take it personal when I work hard on something, then don’t get many comments. Then I’ll see someone post something similar and they get tons of comments. Then I wonder if anyone even reads my blog or cares. That’s just me pouncing all over my insecurities when I’m down. I know I shouldn’t do that.

 

Many of you are so supportive of me. It makes my day when you take the time to leave a comment. I appreciate it so much. Thank you, thank you. You are awesome!

 

Ok, enough of my pity party. There’s really not much point to this post. My friend Char, once posted about the blog world being today’s “front porch”, where women sit together and share what’s going on in their lives. I guess that’s what I’m doing. Sharing with my friends (because I consider all of you friends) what’s going on.

 

I truly love my life and feel so blessed. Thank you for being part of it!

 

70 comments:

  1. I read your blog! I just don't ever comment... I guess I'm a blog stalker. I love your blog and projects. But don't worry about us, take care of yourself and your family first and if you have the time and energy to blog I'll be here to love it! Thanks!

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  2. Tam - I think that what you are feeling is completely normal. I feel like the headless chicken and I have one kiddo and a full time job. I feel like I am a slacker mom, wife, daughter, friend, aunt, sister-in-law, employee, housekeeper, cook, maid, etc. You hit the nail on the head though when you said you want to make memories with your kids. Time flies by so fast and we don't know how long we are on this Earth, so we must make sure our priorities are in the right order. Family always comes first. I've learned that even though the messiness of my house bugs me and makes me grouchy, it means more to me to get on the floor and play trains with D, or watch a movie together, or have Wii night. The crappy part about chores is that they will always be there for you. Now, the crafting/blogging part I totally get. I have neglected my blog lately, but hope to correct that soon. I know that my emotional gas tank has to be full so I can take care of the other tasks I need to do. Hope this helps. I'm hoping to come up north while my hubby is hunting sometime the end of Sept/beginning of Oct. I would love to try to get together if possible and maybe get a group together and take the kids somewhere fun. Would you be interested in getting together?

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  3. I love the image of the virtual front porch! and, come on, with over 3000 followers you must get comments! Hang in there, some days are just better than others...

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  4. I have so many of those days! It's absolutely crazy to think back even a few months ago where I was with exhaustion and feeling crazy till now - where life feels a bit more normal.
    I understand the comments thing - I feel bummed too when I think I do this amazing project and it barely gets recognized or commented on. I read your blog though.

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  5. You already know what I think....
    You are the bomb diggity!
    Love ya, girly! :D

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  6. Don't get down lady!!! :) You know... I've seen several, as in more than two or three, blog posts lately from other bloggers being low about comment amounts, and their blogs all together. So you're not alone. Maybe it's just that time of season.

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  7. I love reading your posts, I am just not a big commenter, so I hope you do continue to create and blog. I also love to hear about the real everyday world, it helps me to feel normal. And like you said the most important thing is are children, our families, each day is precious, each moment with our children is precious and that should always be our first priority. Good luck with everything.

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  8. I read your posts whenever you write. your family is super cute and your projects are great. I often don't have time to blog as I am chasing around my 2 year old and nursing my 3 mth old. We may not always speak, but we are here :)

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  9. Tam - I know we just had a discussion and it was great having someone listen who "gets" it. I enjoy reading what you post here and I know others do as well! Keep it up! Your hardwork is appreciated!

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  10. "Mama said there'd be days like this..." I think if I can miss a day or two (or a week) visiting all the blogs I follow, then the bloggers can certainly do the same. Enjoy family first. Post when you can.

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  11. I think we all have days like you're having. I too have been feeling burnt out a bit about the blog too. I totally get what you said about the hard work, no comments thing. That being said, you're doing the right thing by spending time with your kids and getting down time when you can. Kids grow up way too fast and they'll cherish the memories you're making with them now...like baking cookies. Hang in there...my thoughts and prayers are with you!

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  12. I completely hear you on this one. I pretty much feel the same way. Life is just running at me so quickly and I NEVER seem to be caught up. So, enjoy the time with your kids. I do want you to know that I love your blog and everything you make and share with us. You are amazing. You are appreciated more then you know.

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  13. That is sooo my life right now. I also have a 6 week old (and a 4 and 2 year old) and finding time to do any blogging/crafting is daunting/exhausting! Good luck with everything! :)

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  14. I so hear you. I am looking forward to school starting and having a bit of me-time daily. Hang in there, my friend!!!

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  15. I'm guilty of reading & not commenting! I'm sorry!!!! I am working on commenting more because now I have become the blogger that wants to get comments all of the time too!!And it totally bums me out when a post doesn't get any lovin! So look for some encouraging comments from your blog friend Liz :)

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  16. I am definitely more of a reader than a commenter and that is because I have the same kind of crazy life as you! :) I only have 3 though so I can't even imagine how frazzled you must feel. I am sure things will start to feel more manage soon, until then I'd love to hang out on this "front porch" with you and listen as much as you want to talk.

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  17. We are here. I read blogs while I am nursing my baby, and so I usually don't have time to comment, because I only have one hand. I also used to read all of my blogs in google reader, so I would read them, and not comment because I never used to actually click on the actual blog. But I installed the "Next" button, and I love that it takes me to all the new posts. I love your projects! You inspire me.

    Craziness...I just realized that you were at the same photography workshop at fotofly as me! Your pictures look great! I am impressed with all you do with your small kids. My 4 kids are almost all the same ages as yours - so I know how busy you are. You are running circles around me, so we totally understand if you need a break! Hang in there!

    P.S. I couldn't post on my internet explorer - I had the same problem trying to comment on one of your giveaways...but I wanted you to know that people are still here - I had to download google chrome just so that I could make this comment!

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  18. Oh, so sorry you've having a bad time of it. I SHOULD comment more often, but I think I'm following too many blogs, and I'm working full time and trying to juggle stuff. But I know how you feel. I do enjoy your posts! Please keep them up and I hope things turn around for you. Just as an aside, I find when I'm taking my B vitamins, I feel a lot better (not to minimize what you're going through, certainly, but just a thought)

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  19. When I had my fourth baby it totally kicked my trash. And he is the best baby ever. It just turned my world upside down. On the upside, I don't have time to stress over germs the way I used to. I was a freak. I still sanitize but I don't have time to think about all the amoeba like creatures growing on my light switches.
    Of course we read your blog! And we love you :)

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  20. Oh man, I love your blog too! It is one of the few I actually read every time the author publishes... I am so horrible at commenting, but I will try and be better! I get bummed when people don't comment on my blog either. Good luck with the family!

    Rachel

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  21. I love your blog! And I understand feeling overwhelmed. Sadly, I get overwhelmed at times and I only have one child (8 months old), a husband, and two cats. It scares me sometimes how I'm ever going to manager when we decide to have a second baby. And working full-time.... ugh. It's tough enough paying for day care for one (full price when he's only there 4 days a week and usually half days).

    And as for blogging, mine is new and there are barely any followers. I wonder if there is any point. I see other bloggers who just hit 1 year and they have so many followers, guest blog posts, and giveaways.

    Hang in there. I know that's easier said than done though. I hope you feel a break in the pressure.

    Jodi @ Make Three
    http://makethree.blogspot.com

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  22. I read and love your blog! I am not good at leaving comments since I use a reader so this comment is pure "gold". :) I know exactly how you feel, not feeling appreciated but still doing the hardest and most important job in the world. Do what you can without guilt. And if you need to say NO, you do not need to give an explanation. It is a one word complete sentence.

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  23. Welcome to having 4 kids, and a newborn too. Give yourself time, life will work itself out and you will find time to blog. I have 4 kids (2,5,11,13) and feel frustrated and overwhelmed a lot of the time. But I find it is the pressure I put on myself to have a perfect house, kids, projects etc.. that causes it. Not being a mom to the 4 of them. I have alwasy found that it takes 3 months after having a baby for life to seem normal and a nice rhythm to set in. Hang in there, you are half way to the 3 month mark.

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  24. Guility - I read and rarely comment. I feel badly because I get so much out of the blogs I follow, including yours, and dont' take the time to comment. I'm working on that! I know how it feels feeling overwhelmed. I hope it lifts for you soon.

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  25. Having 4 young children is tough, I love your blog! Enjoy your time while your children are young and blog when you can.

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  26. I'm one of your many, I'm sure, loyal followers who LOVE your blog but don't comment often. Sorry! I'm here and love what you do. You're amazing! :)

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  27. I feel ya! I craft, post, and then crickets. For a little while I was a little upset, but then I was thinking about it and I just like to share what I make, it's ok if nobody comments. I feel it was my fault, I took a little break and lost what little people I did have.
    But in regards to your blog...I love it, I wish I could comment more. I look everyday you have a new post. I often look when I only have a few minutes and can't comment at the time, then I forget to come back. Which I like to think is what happens when people visit my blog. Please hang with us though, I would miss your blog.
    Amy

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  28. I love your blog--I just started following recently, but I'm already a fan! I will try and do better with more comments--sometimes it just helps to reaffirm that you're doing great things! :)

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  29. I would have thought I wrote this but the ages of my children are wrong (6, 4, 18month and 4 month prego.) Other than that I think you stole the words out of my mouth. Nice to know we are not alone. I love your blog but I understand if you need to take a break.

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  30. You do great stuff - but you need to do it on YOUR timetable - not ours!! We will be here - but don't feel like you HAVE to be - make those memories and enjoy!!! And when you are inspired to write -we will read (and do a better job of commenting - I promise!)...

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  31. Oh, Tam, I feel the same way and I only have 2 kids! I think its the new baby. I just haven't been able to figure out how to balance it all yet. I'm hoping as my boys get older it will get a bit easier. Blog when you can and don't when you can't. Your true followers won't hold it against you when you need some time off. ;)

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  32. Ha ha, I've only posted once in the past month, rarely get more than one or two comments, and I only have half as many kids as you do so really *shouldn't* be frazzled and surrounded by clutter...and you know what? No excuses. Life is for living, the housework won't run away (I personally tested this theory) and blog stuff is for fun. Do it when the urge strikes and don't when it doesn't.

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  33. Hang in there...it does get better! And if you need to take a break take it. we will still be here!

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  34. Aw, I love love love your blog!! I follow so many blogs and enter contests, leave comments, join in on link parties and feel like I have very few followers...but I do love looking back and having a virtual journal/photobook, so I guess it is all worth it. Hang in there friend, because I and I am sure, many, many others are loving your posts as much as myself. :)

    All my best,
    Ali
    xoxo

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  35. oh hang in there! I hate it when even my most insignificant posts don't get comments, let alone the big ones. I think you are super talented and am so glad that someone as creative as you shares your talent with people like me. I don't want to stress you out more saying you have to keep up the blog by any means but know that I appreciate ALL your hard work. New babies are tough. I only have 1 but am due with #2 in December. When I found out how close they were going to be (appx 20 months) I just knew the older one was going to just run around with knives and matches or something equally dangerous (because that is what I leave lying around the house) while I'm trying to feed/bathe/change the other. These woman horomones are tough things to deal with.

    You are great! And you deserve some "ME" time and a nap and some dessert. And maybe another nap and a day without chores or diapers and then maybe some more dessert. Good luck :)

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  36. Hey don't beat yourself up. You have a great blog, and I wonder how these great ladies have a family, a house and are able to keep up on a blog. Thanks for sharing your feelings. Take time for you, we are all still here when you have time to post.

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  37. I wrote a similar post to this a few weeks ago. So frustrating to be frustrated. I think that's what really bothers me. I should be happy with any time I have to sew, because I am lucky to have that time and that my husband tolerates a messy home at times and the fact that I can't make dinner becuase. I am so upset that I can't thread my serger. I should be content to play with my kids all day. So I am frustrated with being frustrated and trying to be content with everything that I am able to do.

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  38. I love your blog! I will follow if you post once a month or every day so enjoy those kids and blog when you want/if you want. Family is more important than anyone here but I'm sure most of understand what you are going through. I only have one daughter and still feel the same way that you do! It will get better. :)

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  39. I do love your blog but am a blogstalker who doesn't often comment. I only have 14 followers of my blog but I still post. I think that we blog for ourselves as a way to create and express! Having a new baby is tough but you will once again feel back in sync. I bet that writing this post made you feel better!

    Lori (one of the 3,000+)
    http://itsthelittlethings-lori.blogspot.com

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  41. Oh my, I think we have all been there!!All Moms totally need a life vest thrown to us every now and again when things get hairy. Thanks for sharing! Those first 3 months with new itty bittys are so busy and unpredictable but magical. Keep your chin up!!

    Your blog really is "So dang Cute"!!

    Jenn M.
    Builditsewitloveit.blogspot

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  42. I read your blog! I don't comment enough on blogs in general, which is strange considering how much I love to get comments. I will try and do better, I promise!

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  43. I just started sewing recently, so I just came across your blog, and I really enjoy it. I stay at home with just two kids and feel so disheveled and out of sorts that I am continually amazed by talented, created people like you who seem to juggle it all so easily. I think that staying home is much tougher than we are given credit for, and it sure can take a toll on your self-esteem! Enjoy that dear little one of yours, and we'll be here when you have time for us, waiting for your words of wisdom and inspiration!

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  44. I can totally relate, Tam! I feel that way often, and feel nervous of how I'm going to balance it all when baby #3 arrives. But I think you have the right outlook - family first. People will stick around and be there when you are able to post. You have to know how fabulous we all think you are. :)

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  45. You're a fav read for me. Note to self: must comment more often! <3

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  47. I'm a new mom too and I just want to tell you how much you inspire me. I admit that I am one of those people who read daily but leave a comment never. But do know that you do inspire in many ways!!!

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  48. You have a great blog, it's always one of the first I look at. It's "Sew Dang Cute". Of course, family and life come first.

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  49. Tam,
    I think you are doing a Great Job!! My goodness you just had a baby!! It may be your 4th, but your body has to make adjustments each time like it did with your first. You and your family should always come first, and when you have the time to Blog, we will all be here anxious and excited to hear what 'Cute' things you are doing!!

    Huggs,
    Nancy

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  50. I read all your posts.... I feel the same way sometimes, is it worth all the hard work? But then, I have so much fun with it as well. You do make a tone of great stuff - and you got more than 2 comments this time :) Tone

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  51. If it's not enhancing your life, you should definitely slow down on it. Take it to one post a week or something. You'll never get this time back with your kids. I have three boys, 2, 4, and 6 and feel the same way. I keep reminding myself they're my greatest WIP and more important than my blog or anything I'm making, although all I wanna do sometimes is craft! :) Follow your heart.

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  52. Tam, I know you weren't begging for comments by this post, but I hope from reading all these wonderful comments you know how much you are loved and appreciated.
    Adjusting to a new baby is hard, even if the baby is the best baby ever. And just so we're clear- baby #4 kicked my butt, big time! In fact my friends staged an intervention for me just to keep me sane. The blog will be here, we will be here. Take your time and just breathe.
    I'll come pick you up for cupcakes. :)
    xoxo,
    Amy

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  53. (((HUGS))) to you! I read your blog and love it! But, if you need to take a break for your family, by all means - DO IT! We will be here on the porch waiting when you get back. Those babies will only be little for a time- love on 'em while ya' can!!

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  54. I read your blog consistently.... It's on my iPad reader, so if you post I read :)! I get those feelings/days, and they suck, but the good news is they pass. I too am a blogger and a fairly new one...still figuring it all out and it's terribly hard when I get no comments really hardly ever and not many reads, but I remind myself I'm doing it for my kids and myself first and formost and that is what matters most. Keep it up, cuz I love reading ya:)

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  55. I love you - I feel bad I have seen you so much over the last few weeks and had no idea about a lot of the stuff you post about and email about - speak up girlie I am here to listen.

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  56. so now you probably don't have time to read all the comments but I wanted you to know, one I lOVE Your blog and wish I could do the things you do!!! and two- I think it's in the air cause I had a break down the other day and just had the I'll never be a good wife and friend, mom, photographer or anything, I'll just always just get by, which now I think just getting by and enjoying life it enough really, I don't need to be the BEST or the GREATest, as long as I do my part!! I'm getting ready to put my husband through med school and as he's applying, people keep telling me most marriages don't last through med school, and I just want to tell them all to leave me alone, I love my husband and I'll do anything for him. But then at night I think can I support him enough for all he wants to do?? I know we can do anything we set our minds too, and if you need to spend more time with your kids do it!!! they need you as a mom!!! Good luck!

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  57. Your Blog is the first one I read the minute I have a free second. I am sure that some other mom's (and me) feel like comments may overwhelm a busy mom. I only get a few minutes at a time, and I know that I love to read for crafty ideas, but I get so inspired by your posts that I jump straight from computer to craft table. NO MORE, I vow to support you in your efforts. Don't ever think your effort is wasted, and don't ever think that your blog comes before mommy-ness. We will all be waiting patiently for your next stroke of brilliance.

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  58. Aww...I'm sorry you are feeling so frazzled and overwhelmed. If it helps any I feel that way constantly and I don't have a newborn! And I'm sorry that I don't comment much but I do read most of your posts. I love your blog and so do a lot of other people and if you need or have to take a break we will all be here when you get back. :) Hang in there!

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  59. Sorry to hear you're feeling frazzled. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one, though...haha. Motherhood and finding time to be your own person is for sure a juggling act. Being a mom is definitely your most important job, but you are so talented - you CAN'T give up your blog! Who else would a stalk and have craft envy for? :) I think Reader has made me into a horrible commenter. I'm so busy, I just sit down and read through the posts and then I'm off again. You have a ton of followers though, so I could see it getting frustrating when nobody comments. I'm sorry - I'm sure once things settle into a normal routine with your little one, you'll be back into your groove for sure! :) Stick with it!

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  60. Tam,
    Your post just described my life to a "T". I just wanted to give you a little love and a virtual "hug."

    I haven't read the previous comments, but I bet everyone has told you how amazing we think you are and that is the "cold, hard, truth" :). Ha ha.

    We need to be better friends you and I. It seems like we are going through the same struggles.

    Love ya girlie. I'll be thinking about you.

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  61. Tam, I feel the exact same way, and I only have one kid right now. I have always wondered how you do everything you do... You are incredible. Enjoy life with your kids. They grow up way too fast. I also want to let you know that I love your blog, and I usually don't comment (sorry), but I check it almost daily. It is one of the few that I have memorized. :) Hope you have a great weekend!

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  62. I figured one less comment was one less thing to add to do to your day, I read your blog DAILY! I love it and all you do! Please don't stop... maybe slow down and spend more time w/ the family.. but please don't stop! ;D

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  63. Tam, your creativity is amazing. I love how real you sounds in your posts, in an environment where there seems to be so many who came across fake.

    A true diamond in the rough! I do hope to still see you around, but when you feel you have something you want to give :)

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  64. I am glad to hear you write about your insecurities. I think they're the same insecurities we feel. I often wonder how I can be as "big" as some of these other blogs that I read - I too, want lots of comments. Keep your chin up!

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  65. Tam, your blog is awesome! I think so many of us can relate to this post in one way or another. I personally have seen just how much you have grown in your craftiness with this blog. I really love the personal posts as well because to me it just seems to add so much more. If you need to reduce the number of posts you do to have more time for yourself and your family, then do it. You will still have us as readers because we get it. You are a great mommy, blogger, and friend. Keep up the good work!

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  66. I am totally guilty of reeding and not commenting! I love what you have done to your Ryker's room! It inspired me to finally redo my Ryker's room! And he is 15 months yesterday! I have two and I feel like that most days! So you are my hero with four!!! Take care and I thank you for what you bring to all of us who read your blog!

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  67. Enjoy your kids and don't worry about anything else. Blog when you can, we all love it!! And remember with a baby that is still so little, you are allowed to take a break, catch up on sleep, do absolutely nothing if you want too!

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  68. I know I'm late to the party leaving this comment, and I'm sorry-- but I meant to comment twice and something intervened!

    So I'm feelin' ya, girl-- I really am. I kept saying I'd lost my blogging mojo. I felt lost and it felt pointless and I went from some comments to few and I was like WHY?

    Anyways you rock.

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  69. I'm just catching up on reading blogs and thought I'd give you a cyber ~hug~. I hope you are feeling better about things today. I wish I had something wise and wonderful to say, but I don't. You inspire lots of people and I hope you know that. We can't do it all - all of the time. As you adjust to a new little one, you'll get back in your groove - it'll just be a little different groove than before. In the meantime, give yourself a break and know that you are an incredible woman and adored by many! ~hugs~

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Where I am no longer blogging, this blog is for reading purposes only. I am afraid I just can't keep up with it anymore, therefore, I may not be able to reply to all comments. Thank you.

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